from now on my penis is your penis
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
And the cops told us we were all naked.
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I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
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