Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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