i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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