We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
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