No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Drunk you assumed that me saying I thought squirrels were cute meant for you to trap one in my car by luring it in with ham. You're going to hell for this.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
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