somebody snuck up and got me drunk
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
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Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
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The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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