Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
babies were throwing up all over the place
Ketchup is God's man juice
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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