zippers are such a cool invention
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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