I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
handjob tips. give me some.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
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