what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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