the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
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She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
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