Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
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