Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize