Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize