What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
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Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
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I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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