I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
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