im having a threesome with these popsicles
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
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Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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