i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
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