I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize