I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
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