Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Accidentally typed message to mom that included word "kink." FML. Played it off as autocorrect from "drink" which was somehow more acceptable
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize