With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I woke up in her bed wearing a top hat and bunny slippers and noticed one of us had pissed in bed. The last thing I wanted to ask for was a ride home
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
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