shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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