therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize