Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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