I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
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