this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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