that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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