So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
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