So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
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