My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
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