After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
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There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
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Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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