I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize