dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
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