Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize