You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
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