Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
You may now shotgun with the bride
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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