The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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