your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
You made me cry and you don't even care
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
Randomize