The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize