he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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