The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
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when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Randomize