so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
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why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
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Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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