the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
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