We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
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It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
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Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
we're so committed to being not committed
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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