i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Holy sore nipples Batman
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize