Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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