remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
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