Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
My heart feels like a grape in a barrel about to be crushed into wine
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
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