i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
You don't make any sense
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